| My livejournal mwah mwah hahaha |
[28 Jun 2005|01:11pm] |
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I used to love you - John Legend |
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Geez I am back but I dunno what to write...hmmm let see I can't call this an update if I'll say "blah blah" lol
work: nothing interesting...just keeping with pace
family: Better than last time, I have more time with them eventhough I have a very hectic sked. My brothers can't help but bother me they are kids they can't help it. My dad is still bald.... O.o
love: wohooo, I really don't like talking about it because I am NOT lucky when it comes with this aspect. I had been waiting god knows how many months and all of sudden you'll just realize you are waiting there for nothing. I could just be pessimistic due to some circumstances ....NEXT TOPIC PLEASE!
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| Alive, Awake....still waiting |
[11 Aug 2004|09:16pm] |
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My Immortal - Evanescence |
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Been busy looking for a job but still hopeful that I would land in my dream job. I wanna do a lot of things but I guess I should be practical ya know.
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LOL I lose a lot of weight thanks to my own cooking LOL!Been cooking for my brothers, I am glad they like my cooking. I really don't like to stay in the house most of the time it reminds me of bumming..again.
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*sighs* Even in my enthusiastic ways with my friends I can't hide that it still hurt inside...the feeling of waiting, hoping that some miracle will happen so the questions in my mind will be answered....gah
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| this is rare?..hahaha |
[16 Aug 2003|12:20am] |
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Get Busy - Sean Paul |
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I am hyper again lol. I just can't get Rodrigo Santoro out of my mind. LOL. Well who is Rodrigo Santoro, you might ask? He is that surfer dude in Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle. He have no interesting role, haven't said a line in the whole movie. LOL.
His body *erm* was the first thing that was focused on him. I can say he is damn sexy >.>; But beyond that rare golden god like of a body, he have this irresistable eyes meaning, when he looks at you you can't help but melt easily hahahaha! *.* I am easily attracted with guys who have such attractive eyes and ummm a god-like of a body just of that golden god from Anne Rice's novel >.>
Like he is a type you wanna take care of ya know. Top naked or fully clothed, he is still decent for me.
I will post his pics some time hehehehe.
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| An old Poem |
[10 Aug 2003|10:44pm] |
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Taking Over Me - Evanescence |
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S h a d o w....
one's mask towards the deceiving world
S o u l....
one's true self that is hidden
S e n s e s....
takes everything as what it is
M i n d....
views it all as an illusion
P s y c h o V a m p i r e....
quenches mind's search for truth and essence
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| back with a new layout O.o |
[26 May 2003|12:22pm] |
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"Rise and Fall" - Craig David and Sting |
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I'm back again!
agjahdsldkjsda!! @ her thesis
Many things are up, umm well all I know I happy for the reason I can't explain ^^
I feel this coming months would be good. Wow talk about optimism.
Who knows the anime of Hana Yori Dango??? One show named Meteor Garden was based from that anime. And eventhough it is mushy at first I dunno why I find it so realistic and moving that one of it's songs made me cry. LOL I can't even understand chinese but the tune tells its meaning.
Just poke me if any of you need me =P
I hope that you are all doing fine and happy cause you all deserved to be happy!!! =^.^=
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| an update |
[26 Mar 2003|11:40pm] |
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Bring me back to life - Evanescence |
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first of all... wbies Kev ^^ long time no see
Classes is over but I will spend my whole summer trying to eidt and improve my thesis. Oh well it is the only ticket out of college, lol and also the comprehensive exams. I just got my classcards and I admit I know I can still have better grades than that. I know it is my fault. I don't take my studies that seriously. As much as possible I don't want to find my whole college life to be boring and all. Like my routine would be I spend most of the day with my friends and trying to hang out in their place or in a mall. I mean I wanted to enjoy college. Not to get myself uptight. lol that what my friends usually say.
They say life is too short but not for me. There are still many things to be done. I dunno I just felt so optimistic these past few days. Like the future is good for me or isn't it?
I am starting to missing him again >.< I wonder if he is doing okay. Probably he have problem going online or something. Hope to see him soon. *sighs* Bet we can talk more now that me have no classes lol.
To all my friends hope that you are doing fine. I missed ya. see ya all sometime. n.n
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| good ol' friday |
[07 Feb 2003|09:16am] |
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"Higher" - Creed |
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this is the weirdest friday I had... cause all plans for the this day seems to messed up....I should be angry but why on earth I am calm and collected when things like this comes in.
friends are there and sometimes they are not...when your not expecting them to be with you they will just be right there and all..I dunno why it irks me..if you wanna talk with them they are busy and having this lame exucuses and so
I am busy myself but why on earth I still give time with friends more than myself??
why sometimes I pity myself? why sometimes I feel so all alone? this could be just a horrible day and all I have to think was my thesis and other people.
I think I need a break from this stresses or maybe I am just depressed again?..how I wish I am not
I like wandering around Manila cause it feels so relaxing been in and out different libraries of Manila but I dunno. been with school friends who are genki and all...and most especially time flies so fast that I feel I am left alone I should stop my pessimistic thinking and being so worry girl in every minute of the day.....
Storm comes rarely
how I wish it would take me
twist my senses
drain my weary soul out
give me a better reason to be left behind
destroy my apathetic barrier
let me not cross paths with a psychic vampire
let others be not intimidated in my presence
let them think I am mere human as much as they are
as the storm drops me back into reality
would it still be the same?
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| ring.... |
[22 Jan 2003|11:44am] |
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Ring (japanese version) ending song |
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*stops reading her friend's lj* lol I have no time making my entry oh well...but now at last I have a break from my thesis lol the deadline of chapter 1(revised) and chapter 2 would be this saturday lol all I do is sleep! O.o
umm well last night we watch the "ring" lol I hid behind the burger I am eating >.>;;
Sadako wherever you are..."You scare the hell out of me..." your worse than a naked gendo!!!! >.< I won't ever watch t.v. late at night alone @.@ *watches the cursed video*.....*hears the phone ringing* says..."Hello?" the girl says..."You have one week....to finish your thesis..." Yay! O.o
seriously I was thinking of buying vcd's of zero, one, and two parts of the ring(jap version) *gulps*
my review of the ring...well I like the twist but I better watch the first part and so thus the american version of it. In a nut shell, it is one of the best horror movies...can't wait to see ring zero and ring 2
tc ppl ^.^
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| bday greeting |
[06 Jan 2003|08:58pm] |
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Happy Birthday song O.o |
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just updated to say....Happy Bday Miki ^.^ Wish you all the best and happiness!!!
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| a northern experience |
[03 Jan 2003|07:36pm] |
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"Hindi Sad Diamonds"- Moulin Rouge |
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I thought the trip won't push over cause it was planned December of last year but as we(me and brothers) arrived from shopping my dad just said we must wake up at around 5 am for the trip. We left last January 2 and it took us 9 hours to arrive there X.x. I slept in our van as I snuggle with my pillow at the back we had three stop overs and the place was great!!! It was really cold and we almost reached the mountain and I can see the clouds on top of it n.n!
The next day we went to the river. The water was so cold I shivered. The waves was to strong that I almost thrown out away with it lol. I am still here though and I think I am starting to have allergies on the thing I don't what i am allergic unto...
take care all and wishing you all to have wonderful New year!!!
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| who needs additional facts on.... |
[18 Dec 2002|10:42am] |
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"To Love you more" -Celine Dion |
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I know cause of that things ahd been hard for him and so his girls ??? *blinks* well past is past ya know....Yvie wanna talk about the one year ago thingy that made you come back to chat???
I don't want to use psychology here but well sometimes someone acts cause he needs a thing to please himself and kinda reward himself for not having that thing in the past. Confusing huh? I know it is not my business again but I think it also happened, not the same thing but almost and I know another friend of a friend in chat who told me someone used a s/n that she though is her bf but all along he was a reg in JA. And my close friend who had a big arguement with him cause of a simple who pmed first thing @.@
Well Miki I read all your entries over and over again...ya know it is a great thing to care for a friend but I think it is all up to her whether to believe on someone or not. It is not your lose anyway...I am just sitting here and listening to all the things that has happened between them but I keep my comments since I can say I am not that close to them. I just say if that makes them happy so be it
Love...I dunno it was used for ages...sometimes it is hard to know if you are really in love but time will tell. It blinds someone and for the fact of pushing away friends just to stick on the feeling of being in love.
I could shut up but silence could mean many things....I had two friends who was a victim well I think it is finished anyways....this could only be chat but ya know hurting someone is a big no no. Even chaeting >.< I heard that everywhee and now even here? Well those cheaters and the one who has been cheated on will find their redemption...time will tell
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| a week full of accomplishements. |
[15 Dec 2002|07:33pm] |
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" The Color of the Night" - Lauren Christy |
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O.o! @Miki's entries. oh well *sighs* I dunno what to say about that since I don't know the whole story but it just shows she cares so much to her friends.
My dad, my brothers, and I went xmas shopping lol and as what is expected there are many people "panic buying" this week lol It feels like I am not in a mall or something...feels like a wet market to me *sweatdrops* I bought gifts and other stuffs. All of the things we bought came from my dad's pocket lol. He is stingy I am not >.<
Our play is over at last!!! *sighs* so my sleepless nights are over. I can relax now..or maybe after classes X.x
Waiting..the word sounds nice made me feel hopeful everday that past that I would make up the things I done in the past to someone who is always been there for me. The one who I least expected to be there is like the one who could be the one for me. *sighs* If I can only turn back time ....but now I can just dream and hope...Or maybe that was just nothing...
I dunno why suddenly I just feel my heartbeat going faster..or maybe I need to set an appointment to a doctor. Kidding aside it is feels so different...as if someone is calling me from afar O.o okay I better stop this..this doesn't sound like me at all *sighs*
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| here I go again... |
[10 Dec 2002|01:40am] |
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"You're still the one" - Shania Twain |
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*sighs* I know he doesn't even want me to take about him with my friends...my intention was not for propaganda. As if he will even read my LJ again. It is only that I was happy to be with him...that was the past and as always my fault again.
I just remembered the time we spent together even it is just online. Missed his offline messages, emails just the time talking with him...I don't know if he still cares oh well this is all what I deserved anyway. Maybe now he found a girl irl...if ever I will be happy for him. Or maybe it is just me. I am depressed again..what is new anyway...maybe tired but I dunno sort of contemplating. It isn't easy to let go of someone. I lied to myself...supressing the real reason of me cutting it off. I had accepted him..really..I am just afraid to be hurt and maybe frustrated that I can't heal his pain. Can't even tell it all to him what for?...I am all messed up so better let it be what it is right now. At least it is enough for me that I can still talk and he still pm me *sighs and gets drunk with Pepsi blue O.o*
Why still I can't forget you?
It isn't easy to forget
leave all the happy memories behind
I can't almost sleep at night
wondering if you still think of me
or if you had someone
what can I do now?
nothing....
wanting to say sorry for all the things I have done
sorry for pushing you away
sorry for hurting you
All I want you to know
I thanked you for at least being part of my life
sharing yours with me
You are my heart
thanks for giving it to me....
If only I could tell this...but I can't
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| I want to know the truth.... |
[25 Nov 2002|02:21pm] |
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"Alone" - Moon Hee jun |
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*sighs* okay now..this may sound unfair to my part since I don't know what is really happening around here...I mean I read tons of entries @.@ but still I can't understand it. Ya I haven't been around much and I know it is not my business whatsoever but I wanna know the truth.
What happened to Ren? I mean the last entry totally confused me. Cause I just don't wanna believe in a certain thing that I just heard from one side ya know. How about Ren's side ne? And is it possible, sorry for my ignorance in LJ, that you can make an entry in another LJ which isn't yours? I can't leave a comment on his LJ, since more than 89 posts I guess. And now as I checked it ....his lj is deleted. For me this case is not finish until we or I haven't heard Ren's side...why? cause it is just sound unfair....for me nothing is true if both sides haven't been heard. Sorry but I can't blame Ren...why? ,if he was the one who deleted his LJ, cause most posts there were commenting on the thing he could have done but for my part it couldn't have been for what most of ppl did was accused him so what is there to say for Ren if most of his friends turned their backs on him...but it was purely accusing...how about what can Ren's reaction?
*sighs more* it is just unfair...Ren haven't even said anything...noone really knows the truth but Ren alone ..but what did most of his friends done...turned their backs on him. I want to asked him if all those accusations was true...but how?....most of his friends pushed him away like he is a plague of some sort...
sorry for those who have read this entry, especially for those who had been against Ren after that incident....it just feels so unfair and all....and is it better that the truth came from him...I mean at least you had confirm or asked if every accusations you gaved to him are all true....*sighs* this is so disappointing....
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| asereje...budipipi? o.O |
[20 Nov 2002|12:24pm] |
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the Asereje song ...I think? |
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well I got used staying up the whole night and morning finishing papers, projects etc. and that could be the reason of me being hyper ne? I don't know it doesn't feel like me to be in a hyper mood in the whole week all of a sudden. Like joking around with my friends and last time my prof asked me this "How to conduct a case study?" I said " umm stalk the person you want to study?" She smiled at me and said "no" as the whole class laughed oh well @.@ Seems my recitation had been a product of my philosophical sarcasm and exaggeration.lol
I missed my online friends. If ever I get online..I mostly just be like for an hour however I want to spend and burn time talking to you ppl lol No RP's ....just pure talk ok? =p *pokes all her friends* bye and tc all see ya around ^_^
P.S. who on earth sang that ASEREJE song? o.o that song is played all over the air waves and seen many people dancing in that tune in the t.v. O.o I don't like the dance steps...and even the voice of those singers @.@ what a nice LSS...
P.S.S (if there is such a thing) I updated my personal info :P my yahoo s/n, msn s/n, email and mini-biography is there now so..ja
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| taking some test...gah |
[13 Nov 2002|08:45am] |
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"Best in me" -Blue |
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According to "The Wedding Date Predictor"
"YOU WILL BE MARRIED BY: Saturday, July 1, 2006"
I must count the doomsday that is coming lol >.< I dunno as long as the guy I will be married to would make me feel a better person ya know. Would make me laugh and not let feel messed up even if I know I am....especially would bring out the best in me
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| new layout... |
[02 Nov 2002|08:06pm] |
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"In the End" - Linkin Park |
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sorry for the ramble I had..I just had a hard time with myself.As what Ren's sai I should promised myself first.. just arrived from the trip. The trip back from the dizzy almost made me puke. I felt really dizzy @.@. But actually the trip was not enough ...if only I can have one month of vacation...since classes will resume again ..oh well that is all...ja and tc all
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| I am just human.... |
[31 Oct 2002|05:32pm] |
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"To where you are" -Josh Groban |
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just like what I always am....I did something, better call it I eat my pride eventhough I would be like a begging person for someone. I send an offline meassages explaining my side and even sending a mail. If he wants to rerad it so good but if not I can't do anything. I know my mistakes..and I have taken actions on it.
before anything ...Allen, please this is my problem not ours, thanks for leaving comments however this is about me and him and it is a long story for anyone to understand it...and as I was always tell ya stop cussing people you don't know *sighs*
I am still in vacation and that far from our house. The travel was kinda exhausting for 5 hours actually. I met Plum and my friend Dash however one of my friend got sick so she didn't came with us. It is quiet in the place and relaxing
November again *sighs* one year after my mother passed away...I will go to the cemetery as soon as I have arrived south. Tombs beside her..well my auntie, my uncle, my grandmother,(all in my mother's side)while in L.A. my grandfather and my auntie(still on my mother's side). I can't help but cry as I approach those tombs especially my mom's. So many memories....she was also the reason why I am like this...I admit I hated her...cause she lied to me once, betrayed me , I trusted her however she lied to me, and after that time I started to be less trusting...or better call it I don't trust that easily.
if that was the thing he wanted to know..well that is all I'm gonna say. Ya he reminds me of myself...sometimes it feels he is an alter ego but not..but still I admit I am worse....it is like an arguement with myself although in a different person. As what they say.."the enemy lies within the self" ya myself is my enemy and I had lose many things in my life...my loved ones who just died obne by one..like leaves that fall in autumn...my irl firends...even my best friend cause of a certain thing that I dunno. I had face things alone and gotten used of it. Experiences thougfht me of the ways of life but it is still not enough. lol I cried again...what a cry baby I am ne? I didn't let my friends saw it.
now I dunno...it seemed every friend that I had just go away for either they don't want to tell me the reason or just go unnoticed....I better prefer that they will tell the reason bluntly and straight to my face so at least I will know where I should stand...for now I dunno where I shoudl be...
I am starting deleting s/n's just left one to see of he still wants to talk or not...
To him: I am sorry, whatever you think the things I have done..Sorry for saying things that hurt you and okay then I take the blame. I am just human to make mistakes and so thus I will admit those things that if that is what you want. Ya obviously, I broke it up with you...but I got my reasons but you tried to still insists your assumptions...it will be pointless anyways if I expalin my part..if I deserve your criticisms from whoever is your new found gf and friends...then tell them then...if I deserve a roaring laugh from you..so be it...if I deserved losing friends cause of you so be it...well goodluck then to you..don't worry about me I am gonna be fine. Goodluck and hope you will be happy to your new job and so thus your boss. Goodluck to your life. Wishing you all happiness and thanks for being a part of my life even I am the one who detroyed it. Thank you for sharing laughs and youir life with me. Your a funny,smart, nice and sweet friend eventhough i just meet you in chat..you deserve all luck in the world. Always take care Richard...
To Where You Are
Who can say for certain
Maybe you're still here
I feel you all around me
Your memories so clear
Deep in the stillness
I can hear you speak
You're still an inspiration
Can it be (?)
Fly me up to where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile to know you're there
A breath away's not far
To where you are
Are you gently sleeping
Here inside my dream
And isn't faith believing
All power can't be seen
As my heart holds you
Just one beat away
I cherish all you gave me everyday
I know you're there
A breath away's not far
To where you are
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| vacation... |
[20 Oct 2002|06:51pm] |
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"Everyday" - Bon Jovi |
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thanks to those who gave out comments on my previous entry...I appreciate it ^^. Well Destiny...I just don't know. It is just that I met people who asked me the same question and believed that there is such thing.
they will be like "I met you cause of destiny". In the back of my mind.."...It is just a coincidence" *sweatdrops*
Right now I am ...*points at her current mood* T.T To the point that I can't even have the energy to be online or go in chat.If I would even be in chat I could feel weird to the sense that sometimes I feel I am talking with myself or getting idle and just stare at the computer. And my migraine is on the loose >.<
My dad will say that I need to calm down and rest and lessen my time spending online I was like " As if I am always online...". Another thing he told me "If I found out you have someone online..you will hear from me. I will not let you chat anymore" T.T
I need a vacation...maybe for a month and so.
Me and my friends will be going way north to visit our friend who we haven't seen for couple of months. It would be cold there *.* and it is an interesting place if you ask me. I think that is all for now...tc all
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| comments are extremely needed... |
[18 Oct 2002|10:06am] |
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"Whenever, Wherever" - Shakira |
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Is there such thing as destiny? O.o! It doesn't sound like me to ask but sometimes thoughts like that bother me.
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ourizeth's journal